Im An Astronaut

Today, I heroically ascended the 3nd floor staircase in my house — no oxygen tank, just pure grit.

At the top, I snapped a selfie, then I descended back down, clutching my Liquid Death.

I then stepped outside, rang the bell, kissed my Chevelle, and basked in the glory of my cosmic impact on America.

Single-handedly, I’ve redefined space exploration 🚀 NASA’s calling, but I’m too busy building software.

Being an astronaut is incredible.

You're welcome America 🇺🇸

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