What if the next hype is eating crayons?
LinkedIn Titles/Tags in 48 hours:
🖍️CRAYON-NATIVE ARCHITECT
🖍️CRAYON EATING EVANGELIST
🖍️STRATEGIC CRAYON CONSUMPTION ADVISOR
"Most people are eating crayons wrong. Here's my 7-step framework."
"Just mass-recruited 400 people who've been eating crayons since 2019. DM me."
"Crayons won't replace you. Someone eating crayons faster will."
The crayon isn't even cold yet and there's already a "CRAYON-NATIVE LEADER" in your feed explaining how he's been "crayon-curious" since 2017.
Bro you were doing B2B SaaS lead gen for a CRM no one's heard of. Now you're a Strategic Crayon Consumption Advisor. You have Crayon Office Hours. A Calendly. For crayons. Found on your freshly created personal website. Stop it.
Someone posted "Most people eat crayons wrong" with a carousel. Slide 4 is just a triangle. Slide 7? "DM me." Always "DM me."
Founders are saying "crayon-first" in pitches for invoicing software.
A16Z dropped a 9,000-word essay called "Crayons Eat The World." The word "wax" shows up once.
There's a $2,400 course now. CRAYON MASTERY ACCELERATOR. The curriculum? Eat crayon. Post about crayon. That's it. That's the whole thing. But you bought it because they are now an "🖍️CRAYON-EATING NATIVE ARCHITECT EVANGELIST".
They must be good.
You don't know what's in the crayon. You don't know how it's made. You just know it's red and a guy with a ring light said he eats crayons better than you. So you ate it.
So you updated your title. You ate the crayon.
Congratulations. You're an innovator now.
❤️
Jake